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Kaizoku no Blin/12
"Generation Frick" is the 12th episode of the Kaizoku no Blin series. Intro music: BRADIO - Golden Liar ---- *Bell ring sounds* Rune: Yo! Before this episode begins, I want to explain why Gourd named this chapter as such. He's sick for today and he can't join us here, right? *Projector sounds* Rune: Generation Frick is basically what we here at the KNB Production Committee call the Generation Z (or people born between 2000 and 2013) and the older Generation Alpha (born 2014 onwards) kids. And yeah, 1997 isn't the start of the Gen Z because we only started being into social media by our teens just like the rest of the Millennials. Totally far from the 7-year old kids nowadays that have better phones than me. So fuck you, all of you fake researchers at MTV, Vox and Buzzfeed. Rune (sighs): So "Generation Frick" begins by the year 2004 and they are still being born. We expect that the first batch ends by this year. These people grew through online media such as YouTube, which lately began anti-swearing measures to cater to their advertisers and even made their Rewind relatable to THEM. Since then, the minced oath "frick" came out in "Christian Minecraft Servers" as a form of "freak" which in turn is a form of "fuck" and became an iconic symbol of post-2015 Youtube. Rune: Now you seem to get the idea, I apologize for the information overload. Please enjoy the rest of the episode. Bye! ---- Johanne suddenly woke up. Johanne: What the-?! Why am I dreaming about Jonathan? Ugh! Probably I needa sleep again. Johanne notices the drool on her desk and cleans up. Johanne: What the fuck? Did I really slept that good?! Ahh, I need a little more sleep. I'm still tired as hell. Johanne gets in her sleeping position and snoozes her way out until somebody wakes her up. She gets her pillow and smiles before closing her eyes. In her dreams, a "generic" old man appears. Man: Hey, you! Johanne: Me? Man: Yes, you. Lemme see. I know you! Johanne: W-What, s-sir? You're freaking me out! Man: Yeah, I really do know you! You're Johanne! Johanne: Please answer my question or I'm gonna knock you out! Man: Chill, girl! I'm a simple monk who just achieved Enlightenment. Johanne: Really? I think that's sounding like bullshit to me. Man: Yeah, yeah. Literally everyone told me that. ---- Johanne: Well, why not? You literally spout bullshit like Enlightenment even though that era passed long ago! Man (hits Johanne in the head): Wrong answer, you blockhead! I'm talking about spiritual enlightenment. Johanne: Ow! That hurts! And why did you send me here? Man: I know what your real name is! And guess what, you really weren't born with the name "Johanne". Your real name is... wait. I gotta drink a little water first. I'm thirsty. Johanne: WTF, gramps?! You should've told me earlier! Man: I'm sorry! I'm sorry! After a few moments... Man: Woooooohhh... That water was tasty! It's sweeter than bottled ones, and more ecologically-friendly. Well, you want to find out what your real name is? Johanne (seemingly pissed off): Yeah, please give me it. Man: Your real name is... Johanne notices someone passing by. As a result, the man whispered her real name to her. Johanne just fell silent and nearly came to tears. ---- Meanwhile, the fight between Jonathan and Kwaito continues. Jonathan activates Fūjin, an offensive technique that allows him to charge quickly and deal a large amount of damage. To do this, he turns his one foot into light and use the other foot to charge. Kwaito: RASTEIRA DE COSTA!! The amount of damage send another massive shockwave, and Kwaito's defensive technique is stronger than Jonathan's offense. This sends Jonathan flying, but he manages to recover. Kwaito: Why you still ain't talkin'? You makin' me quite bored already! A normal person would tell me out of curiosity "Hey, Kwaito? What kind of power you have? Stop beating me with it please!" Jonathan: You just told me that "Capo"-what's that shit called again? Kwaito: DID YOU JUST CALLED MY CAPOEIRA "SHIT"?! Jonathan: Oh no, here's the triggered troll again. Heh, I don't care. Kwaito: THAT'S IT, YOU MADDAFAKA! Açoite-de-Braço! Jonathan: Probably I need to say it. Jonathan (breathes heavily): Fūjin: Yamaoroshi. Jonathan's attack managed to land on Kwaito despite the latter's strong takedown move. Jonathan: Want more? I got more. Kwaito: BRING IT ON!! THIS AIN'T EVEN MY FINAL FORM! Jonathan: Real funny. Keep stealing quotes from other anime series. ---- Kwaito activates his upgraded Mente Musica again by repetitively dancing the ''Ginga ''technique. Jonathan comments to this as "dabbing". Jonathan: Stop dabbing. Kwaito: Just jack off someone's horse, okay! You have seen this shit earlier. Jonathan: ¿Qué? Kwaito: Mente Musica: Roda. Chamada. Jonathan just stares blankly at Kwaito. His sight of disinterest is quite obvious. While he watches Kwaito, Jonathan activates light out of his right arm and left leg. Kwaito: WITNESS MY ULTIMATE MOVE! MACACO EM PEEEEEE!!! Jonathan: You're twirling again? Kwaito: ESCORPIAAAAOOOOOOOO!!!! ---- Jonathan: Sorry, but I seem to found a counterattack to Capoeira after all! Akurojin... As Kwaito falls unconscious into defeat, Jonathan names his technique. Jonathan: ....no Hi.... Jonathan: ...to Aobōzu. Jonathan: A kick-and-punch combo. Akurojin no Hi is basically a powerful amplified Negativa and Aobōzu is just... the perfect ultimate light-speed punch. Even though Jonathan did defeat Kwaito, he also suffered the amount of exhaustion from the fight as well as the damage he took. He suddenly collapses from exhaustion, only to stand up after a few moments. Jonathan (coughing and said in a weak voice): I'm coming for you, Johanne! ---- Meanwhile, Johanne just sleeps comfortably in the room. Jonathan arrives and adjusts her head to fit a very soft pillow in. Jonathan creates a Genbu shield with the last of his light and Onryo whips to slide her along. Jonathan: We're going home. Let me carry you, even though I don't like you so much. Johanne smiles once again while she is sleeping. Johanne (sleep-talking): You don't need to do this. You're not even my boyfriend! Jonathan (inside his head): Shut up. Jonathan (again inside his head): But come to think of it, she's really adorable when she's sleeping, right? Ugh, why the hell am I thinking of this now?! My mind's acting like a complete romantic piece of shit again. Fuck. Johanne (sleep-talking): Can you hold my hand instead? Jonathan: Sure. Johanne (sleep-talking): Can you bring me someplace else? I feel like I need some daaaate... Jonathan: Ugh, just fucking sleep. Johanne (sleep-talking): Okay, then! Jonathan drags her with the rest of the desk. Meanwhile, Hansuke encounters him. ---- Hansuke: JONATHA- Jonathan: Shhhhhh... Johanne's sleeping. Hansuke (whispering): And you're carrying the entire desk into the boat? How are we supposed to fit this in? Jonathan: Here's an idea. Take Kwaito with you. Carry his body and let's bring that to our new ship. We can also place that desk there. Hansuke: So it really is over then? We're done with these Capoeiristas? Jonathan: Yeah. We must message Moufassa now. Let's bring home the bacon. Jonathan uses his phone to call Moufassa. Seemingly, Moufassa's phone started working this time. Jonathan: Yo, we need to get us out of here. Bring the big ship too and lastly, some handcuffs. Moufassa: Aye, aye. ---- After a few moments, Moufassa arrives steering ''The Unlucky with the Packet Boat being tugged on the back. Moufassa rolls down a plank that shall bring Hansuke and Jonathan aboard.'' Moufassa: All aboard, ho! Jonathan (speaking slowly): That's my line. Moufassa: Eh, you need rest. I'll take care of our ships. Hansuke: I think we can fit our boat within this ship. This one's big enough for us! Moufassa: You know for the first time, I'll say you're god damn right. Hansuke cuts the masts off the ''Packet Boat and placed it inside the hull of The Unlucky. Meanwhile, Moufassa lifts the anchor as they prepare to sail away.'' Moufassa: Anything you want, man? Jonathan: Just give us some sleep. Let's see if we can go to Karakorum Island. I've heard of this island before being renowned for its chefs. Let's get one of those for our crew. Moufassa: Let's go then. ---- At morning the next day, while still in the ocean... Johanne: Yo, Moufassa. I'm starving... you're a butcher right? So please cook something for us! Moufassa: SCREW YOU! I ALREADY TOLD YOU I CAN ONLY CUT MEAT, NOT COOK IT. And shit, I don't even have my knives! Hansuke: Then try it with these. Moufassa: You shittin' me, man? You literally used that to slice the guys off-screen back when we're trying to retrieve Johanne. Hansuke: You're right. Jonathan: Yadda, yadda. Use this one. I'll help with heating the beef. We'll try making sukiyaki for today. Johanne: Are you kidding me?! We haven't had beef in like... weeks! We only had rice and fish and rice and fish. Jonathan: Well, no shit. Kwaito's got a lot of foodstuffs on his ship that we can use up until. I also brought from the kind citizens too. ---- Jonathan and Hansuke are wearing face masks that cover their faces, including their eyes. Jonathan: Everybody calm, this is a robbery! Hansuke: Any of you fucking pricks move, I'll execute every mothafuckin' last one of you! Seller (a black woman): Sir, yo' facin' the wrong way. You know, I can just give you food a little more nicely. Jonathan: You're right, our bad. Hansuke: Say, sir. Was our acting good? Are we pirates enough? Seller: Hmm... Not so much. It needs a lot of improvement. First, y'all need to see clearly. I bring ma' children to the other island fo' acting school and that's how we knew it. So, you see... Jonathan: Good lord, Hansuke. We're just asking her to buy food, not to learn acting. Hansuke: Ah, right. Jonathan and Hansuke left after they pay the vendor. Despite this, she keeps on talking about acting and closes her eyes while she is talking as well. ---- Jonathan: Yeah, she really IS kind. Just really damned noisy. Hansuke: Aren't they all? Jonathan: Nah, obvious there are those who're more introverted like Mandala from earlier. Johanne: Right. How about while we're cooking, let's check our hostage, shall we? Jonathan: You're not really participating in cooking it. Plus, you don't really have anything to contribute. Johanne: Awww-ww... You're really not a fair type of guy. Jonathan: Okay, okay. We're checking the hostage AFTER we're done. Johanne: YAY! I WANNA ASS-KICK THIS GUY!! Jonathan: Please don't hope for that. Johanne: OH, WAIT. SHIT! JONATHAN, MY LETTER TO MANDALA WASN'T SENT! Jonathan: So you became friends with her now? What the fuck, girl? Anyway, that letter was taken care of. I slid that in between her breasts. HEH-HEH. Johanne (slaps Jonathan in the face): SCREW YOU! ---- After Moufassa and Jonathan were done cooking, Jonathan and Johanne visits Kwaito. Kwaito: HUWAA!!! Where the hell am I?! Why am I locked in? And who are you? Jonathan and Johanne: The Purple Rose Pirates, bitch. Jonathan (prepares to click a remote control button): I hope you didn't forget this face. Kwaito: Please, no! Not that button! STOOOOOOOOPPPP!!!! ---- << Previous | Next >> Site navigation Category:Chapters Category:Kaizoku no Blin